“If you are going to disassociate every time you fight now, this is going to get awfully difficult.” Mina was proud that she’d found the word for it.
The druid was perched on the fence at Ambrosine’s farm, watching the horses graze. Even Justice wandered around and casually lipped at the grass, not that he had any need for it.
“I won’t,” Ambrosine replied, distracted. She shifted her weight restlessly from one foot to the next, frowning at her Deathcharger. “That was caused by…something else. Not just fighting.”
“What was it then?”
“Don’t worry about it. It won’t happen again. You’ve fought with me enough to know that I handle it just fine.”
Except for the whole part where she felt guilty if she enjoyed it too much. Mina sighed and rolled her eyes. “Ambrosine.”
“Look, I’ve been broken for years, this is nothing new.”
“Does anyone else know just how broken?”
“No,” the death knight replied, her tone firm.
“I certainly hope not,” Ambrosine said, physically recoiling from the question.
“I’m not sure that mental instability is a good thing to hide from your husband. He could help-“
“If he knew how bad I really was I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t have a husband.”
“That is not how these things work, Ambrosine!” But these words were easy for the druid to say. She was certain of her love for Jander, and of his love for her. She’d never had reason to question it. Mistakes and problems had always been overcome.
But Ambrosine’s innocence in that regard had been stripped years ago. “I’m fine. It was just…an unusual circumstance. It won’t happen again, like I said. No one needs to know what inner demons I wrangle with when they’re all kept leashed.”
Mina put her hands on her hips and just stared.
Ambrosine smiled brightly.
“You know,” Mina said with a sigh, “I really doubt Jaffar is that dense. I mean, no one expects you to be all sunshine and roses, Ms Paladin Turned Death Knight. Few who have been fighting long are without their burdens. I am just not sure that–what is it you say? Fake it until you make it is a valid strategy.”
“It’s worked just fine so far.”
“Kitten,” Ambrosine said, frowning.
Mina jumped off the fence and landed with a huff. “Fine, be dumb then.”
“Thank you, I will.” Ambrosine crossed her arms.
Really, everything was fine.