The letter is left lying in the Nar Shadaa flat, on a simple generic datapad, although a small paper card is left beside it signed “Bedisa” in a neat, flowing hand.
Dear sir,
I suppose I shall be clear from the beginning, as I have tried to be in our interactions together so far. I think it best we refrain from meeting for the near future, and perhaps afterwards should we resume our acquaintance, that we do not meet so often. I do regret having to make this decision, I truly do. You have offered up some amazing opportunities and insights into the workings of the Force and the philosophy of the Sith that I treasure for their rarity and their value in my research, and almost as importantly, the pleasure of your company.
However. There is, of late, problems brewing between you and your son, and I do not wish to stir more trouble between you two. I feel as if I have not been as objective as I ought to be, and I am a very poor reflection of the diplomatic training I have thus far received. I can only suggest now that you continue to be gentle with Halonan, and mind him and his pain as well as you may, given the pain in your own heart. I will also say that I will watch out for him and do my best to keep him from the path of darkness, as he is a good man…as are you, somewhere.
There are, of course, more personal reasons for this decision. Since leaving Tython the galaxy has been as exactly as chaotic as was predicted, and then some. I have been exposed to feelings and emotions that I could never have imagined, scenes and events that shocked and surprised, and I am still learning and stumbling my way through them, innocent and naive as I know I must be. You have not been the least cause of these tumbling thoughts. With all that has gone on, including my first experience with battle, I find my thoughts too unsettled, too uncertain. I need time to reflect and meditate further on what I have learned so far, and on how to best continue our friendship, if I may call it that. I do like you, I appreciate your life experience and your wisdom, and I know you have been very clear with me on many fronts.
But not in all.
Dear Brembal, forgive me for speaking as I do. You have spoken of honesty, and although I am but newly a knight, and have been so little in the galaxy, I am still trained in the Jedi arts and ways of the Force. I know what I can see and sense. I have feared for you as I fear for your son, for there is still some deception in you. I am not sure what it is or for what reason, but you still hide something. I am not sure you see me as I see you. And I am sorry for my doubts and fears but they are as they are. Even so…you do still have good in you. I still believe in that, and I believe you are not half so evil as some may think. I have faith the Force will guide you to greater balance, and perhaps this time apart may further that.
While I have come to doubt the Order’s teachings, or the strict definition of their rules and guidelines, I do still believe, in my heart, that they do more good then ill. I take solace in my belief of the Light, and I pray that you will find greater peace soon as well.
My best wishes,
Bedisa
ps: I am sorry. I was going to make mention of our shared…experience… here the other night, but I was afraid to think on it again. Or nervous. I am unsure, but I realized I had better ought to, for to attempt to forget it or make no mention of it would do you a disservice. I cannot forget it. I have never thought of using the Force in tandem, in such an intimate way, and the memory is not unpleasant. I think. With you, in that moment, I felt safer and stronger then I had before. But I still worry, and again, my lack of surety in that is why I wish to take a longer period away and make my emotional and mental footing more sure. Do keep well.
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